Tuesday, October 28, 2008

No on Proposition 8

I got this from one of my friends. This is great!

10 Reaso​ns Why Gay Marri​age is Wrong According to Yes on 8'ers!​....

1) Being​ gay is not natur​al.
*And real Ameri​cans alway​s rejec​t unnat​ural thing​s like eyegl​asses​,​ polye​ster,​ air condi​tioni​ng,​ tatto​os,​ pierc​ings and silic​on breas​ts.​.

2) Gay marri​age will encou​rage peopl​e to be gay.
*In the same way that hangi​ng aroun​d tall peopl​e will make you tall.​

3) Legal​izing​ gay marri​age will open the door to all kinds​ of crazy​ behav​ior.
*Peopl​e may even wish to marry​ their​ pets becau​se a dog has legal​ stand​ing and can sign a marri​age contr​act.​ Lamps​ are next.​

4) Strai​ght marri​age has been aroun​d a long time and hasn'​t chang​ed at all;
*Hence​ why women​ are still​ prope​rty,​black​s still​ can'​t marry​ white​s,​and divor​ce is still​ illeg​al.​

5) Strai​ght marri​age will be less meani​ngful​ if gay marri​age were allow​ed;​
*And we can'​t let the sanct​ity of Britn​ey Spear​s'​ 55-​hour just-​for-​fun marri​age be destr​oyed or Jlo's 3 marriages...​

6) Strai​ght marri​ages are valid​ becau​se they produ​ce child​ren.
*So there​fore,​ gay coupl​es,​infer​tile coupl​es,​ and old peopl​e shoul​dn'​t be allow​ed to marry​ becau​se our popul​ation​ isn'​t out of contr​ol,​ our orpha​nages​ aren'​t full yet, and the world​ needs​ more child​ren.​

7) Obvio​usly gay paren​ts will raise​ gay child​ren,​
*Since​,​ of cours​e,​ strai​ght paren​ts only raise​ strai​ght child​ren.​

8) Gay marri​age is not suppo​rted by relig​ion.
*In a theoc​racy like ours,​ the value​s of one relig​ion are impos​ed on the entir​e count​ry.​ That'​s why we have only one relig​ion in Ameri​ca.​

9) Child​ren can never​ succe​ed witho​ut a male and a femal​e role model​ at home.
*Which​ is exact​ly why we as a socie​ty expre​ssly forbi​d singl​e paren​ts to raise​ child​ren.

10) Gay marri​age will chang​e the found​ation​ of socie​ty;​ we could​ never​ adapt​ to new socia​l norms​.
*​Just like we haven​'​t adapt​ed to cars,​the servi​ce-​secto​r econo​my,​ or longe​r life spans​.​

Don't be an Idoit....Vote NO on Prop 8!

Wednesday, October 22, 2008

A Silent Hardship

As I had posted before, Pregnancy and Infant Loss Remembrance Day just passed. I posted about on this blog, my other blog, Myspace bulletins and also a mass text message to several friends and family. Why did I do this? To spread awareness.

A friend who has had a miscarriage replied to my text message that she doesn't like to be reminded and never talks about it to people who have not been through it. I can definitely understand that. That very reason inspired me to write a blog about what not to say someone who has had a miscarriage (Click here to read).

Her text message got me thinking. I called this blog post a silent hardship because that's exactly what it is. When I first shared this blog with people, I had already written several blogs. A friend of mine emailed me saying that she never realized what having a miscarriage meant emotionally. She stated that nobody talks about it so she truly had no idea until she read my blog. She felt she had a better understanding of this kind of loss and was truly sorry I had experienced it. I was touched and sad that to discover that she was right.

Having a miscarriage is a very personal thing. Some choose to go through it alone. Bottle it up and stash it away somewhere. If every person did this (and a majority of them do) then no one will understand what we have gone through. I think our silence it was causes the type of reactions and behavior mentioned in my other blog post. They are simply unaware. And it is us, those who have experienced this, that made it that way.

I have chosen to not go through it alone. I am wide open with it. I want to spread awareness and I want people to understand that this loss hurts. It stings and leaves scars in our hearts that will always be there. Scars fade but are constant reminders of our past. Scars can make us stronger. So I think we need to tell the stories of our scars.

I mentioned above that I posted about the day of remembrance on a Myspace bulletin. I asked that my friends repost this bulletin and help me spread awareness. And it's disappointing to say that 2, yes only 2, people reposted this bulletin. One was a friend named Danielle who I met through my mother's good friend (her daughter) and the other was a girl I knew from high school who I haven't seen in almost 10 years. Among my Myspace friends are my best and closest friends and family. I believe I have 260 friends and only 2 reposted. 2. It made me sad. This is something I asked for support and I got 2 reposts. I am thankful for those reposts but I really thought more people would support me.

And maybe I shouldn't take that personally but I did. And maybe there was something I didn't repost in support of them. But if I read it, I would have. I find it hard to believe that only 2 out of 260 people read that bulletin.

This only proves my point even further. If it was a post about Breast Cancer, it would have gotten more attention. Miscarriages and Infant loss does not get the attention it deserves. And I hope if there are any of you reading this that are a part of the majority that stays silent, that you will change your mind. Give this tragedy the attention it deserves. Allow society to view this type of loss as something that matters and is more than just a fluke.

Saturday, October 18, 2008

The Love of My Life

I realized I do not post many pictures of Hailey on this blog, I post tons on my other blog but not this one.

Here's my beautiful Hailey at 2 months old. A proof of success after a miscarriage!

Thursday, October 16, 2008

Unbelievable!! Stupid Stupid Potheads

I am on my way to Walmart (which I hate but they sell formula cheaper) and am sitting at a stoplight. I turn to my right and see a girl in the passenger seat of the car next to me packing a marijuana pipe! She then hands it to the driver and he takes a big hit. I am astonished.

I glace in the back seat only to see a little girl who couldn't be older than 2 or 3! Unbelievable! I think my mouth dropped to the floor. At that point the light turned green and he sped off in mid-puff.

If I was not in such disbelief I think I would have written down the license plate number and called the cops. I didn't think about it until later.

Now I understand that smoking pot is a very common thing in this society. I no longer allow myself to be surprised when I see someone I know light up when I didn't know they were into that. I do not smoke myself. I tried in High School and wasn't interested in continuing. I spent a good portion of my life being bitter towards those who continue to smoke but I am over that now. If people want to smoke pot then so be it. Not my problem.

But I do have a problem with this situation for a few reasons.

1. His dumbass was driving as he was smoking...right next to me. So here he is affecting his driving ability while on the same street as me, not to mention in the very next lane.

2. His farking daughter was in the car with him! Klassy! If you are going to be stupid and juvenile enough to continue smoking outside of your teens then at least do not smoke in front of your kids and do not drive them as you are smoking or under the influence.

I have heard regular pot smokers say they are better drivers when they are high. SERIOUSLY? I guess you have damaged enough brain cells to actually believe this is true! If anyone thinks for one second it's ok to drive high then you are an idiot.

I personally do not see the point of using drugs but I am not a pothead or drug addict so I guess I will never understand. And one can make the same argument with drinking alcohol. It's all self-destructive in one way or another, it's just most are not willing to admit it. I am not much if a drinker but do like to drink occasionally and always socially. However I do not have to be drunk or buzzed to have a good time.

So there you have it. White trash pothead drives 2 year old daughter as he hits his pipe and for some reason he and the mother see absolutely no problem with it. Amazing.

Wednesday, October 15, 2008

My Candle is Still Burning

I lit it at 6:45pm to be exact and it's still burning almost 4 hours later. I can't bring myself to blow it out.

Proposition 8, My Thoughts

A friend asked me what my thoughts were on this now that I am a parent. I understand that this could bring on a lot of hateful comments considering that this is the Internet and anyone can read this but please keep an open mind. This is my opinion and I am allowed to have it.

Honestly the hype that they are creating around this issue is a bit overkill. It reminds of segregation with the whites/blacks. Imagine all the hype and controversy surrounded by the end of this. I am sure white people went crazy over it and made up similar issues that could make the end of this horrible. "My kid will be sitting next to those black kids, they will be eating in the same places as us, I will have to drink from a fountain after them" You know what I mean? It makes me sick.

Teaching homosexually and the fact that they can marry is not necessary and even so will not end life as we know it and it will not teach our kids to be gay (though they haven't said this specifically I bet this is the thought process behind most people regarding this part of the issue). Textbooks will not have to be ripped from the bookshelves and re-written to include "gay marriage." Marriage can be defined as a union between two people. That's it, two people. No need to go into it any further. It doesn't have to be played out to the extent of "boys can marry boys." Marriage is a union between 2 people. period. Not to mention I don't remember marriage being taught in schools. Do you? If they did, it did not stick in my brain at all. Its such a small part of the curriculum. But that's just my opinion. I think they are blowing parts way out of proportion.

Churches should not be considered hate groups (once again over exaggeration/hype). Church and state are supposed to be separate anyway. Catholic churches do not recognize marriages outside the church. Meaning if a catholic couple does not marry in a catholic church then the church does not view them as married. So why can't gay marriage be viewed the same way? If churches choose what marriages they recognize for heterosexual couples then the same can go for all marriages. In the Mormon religion if a couple divorces, the state considers them divorced but the church makes a decision whether they will look at the couple as divorced. If they deny it then the man can remarry but the woman cannot. This belief/practice is not in textbooks or mandated by the state. Why? Church and state are supposed to be separate.

The state doesn't necessarily mandate what parents teach their kids. Some parents teach racism to their kids and that's not mandated by the state so why would the state make teaching of gay marriage mandatory? They cannot control how people parent so why do they think the state can with this issue? And accepting gay lifestyles? Come on, the lifestyle will be there regardless of whether they can marry. Attacks against them are already considered hate crimes without them being allowed to marry. So if you think about it, the state already mandates acceptance.

I have no idea what tax implications this will cause and I can't see how this will effect taxes. We don't pay heterosexual marriage taxes so why would gay marriage affect anything to do with taxes?

I dunno. This just reminds me of segregation with black/whites from over a 100 years ago. Why does marriage have to be between a man and a woman according to the state? That definition of marriage came from the church centuries ago when religion was mandated and there was no freedom of religion. So by limiting marriage to being between a man and a woman is forcing religious beliefs and acceptance of those beliefs on the population if you think about it. We all decide what religion, if any, we want to follow and each church has their own sets of practices. So allow all of us to make that decision.

OK sorry I feel like I am rambling. I have all these thoughts in my head about it but never actually put them into words. Hailey is napping so I have time to write it out! haha!! I hope I haven't offended you in any way. Its just my random thoughts and me thinking out loud!

Today We Remember....

Today, October 15, is the National Day of Remembrance for pregnancy and infant loss. In honor of Pregnancy and Infant Loss Remembrance Day, it has been suggested that grieving parents and family members light a candle at 7 p.m. in their respective time zones to create a wave of light around the world in memory of babies lost to pregnancy and infant loss. Would you join me in this today?

Did you know that October 15 is National Pregnancy and Infant Loss Remembrance Day? Many people aren't aware that this day has been designated a national day of remembrance for miscarriage, stillbirth, and infant loss.

The resolution to declare October 15 a remembrance day passed the United States House of Representatives on September 28, 2006. It was the result of tireless efforts by a group of miscarriage awareness activists led by Robyn Bear, who had six first-trimester miscarriages in the span of 1997 through 1999 before ultimately receiving a diagnosis of balanced translocation.In honor of Pregnancy and Infant Loss Remembrance Day, Bear suggests on her website that grieving parents light a candle at 7 p.m. in their respective time zones to create a wave of light around the world in memory of babies lost to pregnancy and infant loss.

Friday, October 10, 2008

Sign the Petition for Preemies

In the United States today, 1 in 8 babies is born prematurely. More newborns die from premature birth than any other cause. But solutions are within our grasp. Together, we can find the causes of premature birth, ensure moms get health care during pregnancy, and create workplaces that support maternal and infant health.

Act now and let everyone know it’s time to do more to help moms have healthy, full-term babies. November is March of Dimes Prematurity Awareness Month. Sign the Petition for Preemies.

P. S. Want to make an even bigger difference? Please forward this message to family and friends. Tell them you signed the petition and ask them to join you!


Pregnancy & Infant Loss Awareness

October 15th is National Pregnancy and Infant Loss Remembrance Day in the United States. Each year, over half a million dreams are shattered. Out of 3.3 million born alive, some 30,000 die during the first 28 days. Another 39,000 babies are still born. Miscarriage occurs in fifteen to twenty percent of pregnancies, while ectopic pregnancy occurs in one percent.

More than 25,000 children are stillborn in the United States every year leaving mothers, entire families and communities devastated. Estimates of the rate of occurrence of stillbirth make it at least as common as autism.

Stillbirth is not an intractable problem. Greater research would likely significantly reduce its incidence, but good research requires good data. H.R. 5979: Stillbirth Awareness and Research Act is under consideration by Congress. This proposed bill would standardize stillbirth investigation and diagnosis, thus providing more data for the needed research. Better research means fewer children born still.

On October 15th, remember the thousands of unfinished children lost and the families who remain to grieve them. Honor them by taking action. Let's help pass H.R. 5979.
pregnancy loss

3 Years until 30

I turned 27 yesterday. In 3 years I will be 30. I can't believe it, I still feel like I am too young to be married with a baby. Like I should still be asking my mom permission to go somewhere or I need to go to school on Monday.

I can't believe how time flies. It feels like yesterday I graduated High School. I feel like Randy and I are still young kids.

I am an adult. I live on my own. I have a husband. I have a beautiful baby. I imagined how all of this was going to be when I was younger and now I am finally here. It's so surreal when I think about it.

Now I picture life when we are retired with grand kids. Although it will be a great time, I hope it doesn't come as fast as this stage in life did!!

Wednesday, October 8, 2008

Diarrhea of the Mouth

I find that I come across this way too often. What's my definition of it? When someone talks without thinking and what comes out is a bunch of crap. Also unstoppable talking that has no value.

Mostly it's when someone says something completely inappropriate. Makes you think "WTF? Did that really just come out of your mouth?" You know when you are announcing great news and someone rains on your parade by telling some horrific story related to what you are saying. Like announcing your pregnant and then someone follows their Congrats with a story of their sister's friend's miscarriage.

When I was about 30 weeks pregnant, I was with a bunch of girls I didn't know very well. I was asked how far along I was and when I told her, she told me of her friend who just lost her baby at 30 weeks because the cord wrapped around its neck. Devastating story however why she felt the need to share it with me at that given moment is beyond me. Now you have me freaked out it will happen to me and I am watching baby movements like a hawk.

It's like she didn't know what else to say after I answered her question so the story came pouring out of her mouth (like diarrhea) without even thinking first. If we were talking about pregnancy losses then I would understand why she may share the story.

I am sure you can relate on some level to what I am saying. I am wishing there was some sort of over the counter cure for this. Peptobismo for the mouth.

I know someone close to me who does this all the time. This person will remain nameless. I think she is so socially awkward the only responses she can think of are usually of the negative nature. Hardly having anything positive to say because it's easier to think of something negative. Quick to respond but doesn't think first.

So diarrhea if the mouth is my knew phrase to explain this. I think it fits pretty well.

Tuesday, October 7, 2008

My Heart Breaks

My heart breaks as I read Stacy's blog. She gave birth to her beautiful son today. After 16 minutes, he passed away. Her husband and her prepared for this day. Instead of planning a shower, decorating a nursery, or picking out a "coming home" outfit, she planned her unborn son's funeral and memorial service. I type this, as I am holding Hailey. I sobbed as I read the sad news of baby Isaac and held Hailey a little tighter. I looked at her and cried. Sad that Stacy would not experience this with Isaac and thankful that I am able to with Hailey. I could not imagine what she is going through. To carry her son to full term to only say goodbye. I bet those were the best 16 minutes of her life. I don't think she will ever forget how it felt and he will have a place in her heart forever. She is one of the strongest people I know. My heart breaks for her and I wish her strength through this devastating time.

If you would like to read Stacy's story,click here. And you can also click here for her blog she dedicated to her sweet Isaac.

Monday, October 6, 2008

I thought I knew love

I thought I knew love. I do know love but now it comes in a different form. I am in love with my husband. He's an amazing support system and he makes me feel worthy. I battle with my self-worth but with Randy, he lifts me up.

So this different form of love, I call it motherhood. I was told you never know how much you can love someone until you have a child. I look at Hailey and I want to cry. Even when she's crying and won't go to sleep. I stare at her and can't believe she's mine. She is so gorgeous and I am in total awe. I love being at home with her and it makes me want to be a stay at home mom more and more. Unfortunately that's not financially possible.

Randy is a great father, even though he doesn't think it, he really is. Of course I have had my sleep-deprived, post-partum hormonal moments which I have taken out on him but he takes it with such grace. He nodds his head, says he's sorry and kisses my forehead. He's amazing with Hailey and he is totally in love. She has him wrapped around her finger and she's barely 7 weeks old.

Right now I am sitting next to the baby monitor. Hailey is not wanting to go to sleep but he's keeping his patience and talking to her. I know he wants her to sleep so bad but he continues to sooth her. I don't think he knows I have the monitor on.

Motherhood is a great thing to be a part of. After the miscarriage, the premature birth, 4 weeks spent in the NICU I am finally feeling a part of this new club. It's a lifetime membership and I am proud to be a part of it.