Monday, November 24, 2008

And the beat goes on....

3 3 days will be the one year anniversary of the day that changed my life in so many ways. It will be one year since the day I had my miscarriage. Many mixed feelings with this. I am sad, sad that I ever had to go through it and sad to learn of so many other women who have gone through the same thing. It is definitely a sisterhood of silence.

It's so bitter sweet. I never got to meet my first baby. Never got to see its beating heart on the ultrasound screen. Never found out if it was a boy or a girl. I feel like that pregnancy only gave me feelings of sadness, feelings of loss, disappointment, bitterness, guilt. I felt this way for a long timeand at times I still do. But then it dawned on me one day as I was staring at my beautiful baby girl. I may have never met my 1st baby but what my first baby did give me, was Hailey.

No comments: